What is the best way to set up multiple operating systems on a retro PC? He says "that it felt borderline manipulative", and that describes very well what I try to avoid when dealing with salespeople. What interests me more is how we can help those really struggling right now., Questioner: So, are you two gonna finally you know?, You: Ha. These sanity-saving approaches allow you to prioritize your time while also honoring your dedication to helping people who can benefit from your expertise. Does that all Why might a civilisation of robots invent organic organisms like humans or cows? The Direct Approach. Therefore, when salespeople make such a request to me, I am not fast to fulfil it, and I try to ignore it or even politely decline if asked twice. Prepare answers to personal questions you dont want to answer, and visualize yourself responding with them. How do I continue work if I love my research but hate my peers. The place youve lived that has felt the most like home? available, the best tactic here would betodosomething similar that you would when sharing bad How much does where you are from matter to you? But at least in the United States, half the time if someone asks "how have you been" they're not expecting a real answer anyway. Ill just put it out theremy name gets screwed up a lot. Next time you get a pick-your-brain request, you could say something like: "My work schedule is packed and lunch/coffee isn't possible, but I could see us working together on this. When you think like a lawyer, youre more likely to pause and ask yourself the following: Its not enough that they might be trustworthy. But at least in the United States, half the time if someone asks "how have you been" they're not expecting a real answer anyway. However, I would like to point that that request seems a common commercial strategy. Restate the original question with a twist to steer the conversation in a less personal direction. Spend time before the encounter organizing your thoughts and how you might answer challenging questions. Thanks for reaching out. My default way of doing this is by quickly mentioning that it happens all of the time. First names, on the other hand, are a sign of empathy. Does this essay make you think any differently about asking that question in the future? Where I'm from, some youths refused to shake their female teacher's hand. You may opt-out by. Ifyou are moving forward bytelling the customer that you donot currently have amanager Maybe you're simply too busy or you sense someone is seeking endless free consulting without giving anything back. Example: Questioner: "How'd someone like you even get that job?". And frankly, as a relatively young (early 20s) engineer, it only seems right to me to use honorifics when working with more senior individuals, unless I know them very well. As someone named Katarina Elzbeth (no, thats not a typo and no, its not supposed to be Katrina Elizabeth), Ive unfortunately become used to people completely butchering the pronunciation and the spelling. If someone's ballsy enough to call you out for not including them in your intro talk, then I'd probably say something like, "if you're uncomfortable referring to me by the pronoun you'd use instinctively, feel free just to use my name[; I'll let you know if anything else offends me]." By clicking Accept all cookies, you agree Stack Exchange can store cookies on your device and disclose information in accordance with our Cookie Policy. I don't want to write my wife's full name, to keep her privacy. Right now, though, Idont have amanager Your response to those who reach out to you is all about deciding exactly how much time youre willing to share, setting boundaries around what you will and wont do, andmost importantlysticking to those boundaries. Luzern: Walking from Pilatus Kulm to Frakigaudi Toboggan. In order to gather your courage and avoid just letting the issue slide, you need to remind yourself of the simple fact that you arent doing anything wrong by correcting someone. 27 "I'm doing what you said to do.". Ill give you a cookie!. . Certain countries, particularly in Asia, are also sticklers for formal address. It, What truly matters is that the OP has a unanimous answer to his question. And frankly, as a relatively young (early 20s) engineer, it only seems right to me to use honorifics when working with more senior individuals, unless I know them very well. Their mouths twitch and silence lengthens between us. But try, because that effort to treat him as an individual is true respect. Hello, I thought you looked familiar! Having people constantly mess up your name can really get under your skin. He's been signing his emails with his first name since the beginning. I'm also not a Drew." The best answers are voted up and rise to the top, Not the answer you're looking for? How to Carry My Large Step Through Bike Down Stairs? they have abit ofanunderstanding before speaking withyou. 8. Sometimes, this "achievement" is being born as part of a family (that's what a last name represents, and in some cultures, like mine, it carries more weight than it makes sense): "oh, so you are related with". But sometimes you recognize the face but can't remember the name, or you're in a situation where even though you don't recognize the person you're pretty sure they might be someone important that you should know and don't want to be rude to. It is respectful to address someone by their surname until invited to do otherwise. Ms. Hua says of her grandmothers necklace, which has been passed down in her family, Where Im from is everywhere its been. Do you have an object that connects you to your home and to your family? Site design / logo 2023 Stack Exchange Inc; user contributions licensed under CC BY-SA. This is a label given to you . Sometimes when someone calls your name it implies Abraham! I'm sorry, I couldn't quite hear you . James Bond". It's not. thing to say to put up a supportive-yet-firm boundary that doesnt burn any bridges. Which have you used already? All the above applies to both written and spoken communication, though the rare company that has a weird policy on using last names usually reserves it for emails only. Heres a [book/podcast/networking group] that addresses [particular topic]. I've been depressed for quite a long time, for a variety of reasons, but right now it is for 1. Go back to where you came from! were told. How do you know my husband? I would do that too, if I were meeting someone socially and they wanted to know my surname. When boss/teacher asks me: "What's your name?", How would I answer? Another tactic is to not even give away that you don't recognize the person at all. If youre like most of us, you hesitate, thinking, Why on earth would you ask me that?. " Vanessa Hua writes about asking her parents that question: When I asked my father where he was born, I never got a straight answer. In " The Complexity in 'Where Are You From?'. Browse other questions tagged, Start here for a quick overview of the site, Detailed answers to any questions you might have, Discuss the workings and policies of this site. Youll still want to ensure that the correction you offer is straightforward and directyou want to get your point across, after all. Whats the worst someone has ever managed to butcher your name? Like I said, its a little passive aggressive and and maybe even somewhat juvenilethe other tactics are much more effective and efficient. You just say "good" and move on. When it comes to emails I think the most respectful way is to: If you are starting the email chain then be formal the first time i.e. What are some funny ways to avoid answering a question? Of the civilians, I can only recall one CEO that I would have addressed with Mr. And frankly he was a jerk who treated people like dirt. Reductive instead of oxidative based metabolism. Let me know when you are free to discuss VS Let me know your convenient time to discuss which is right and polite. Connect and share knowledge within a single location that is structured and easy to search. Ms. Hua asks, But where did we come from, and why does it matter? What do you think? How to Carry My Large Step Through Bike Down Stairs? When an employer asks for references, you want to get them a list of names right away. more about whats been going onand how they can help. It depends on a person's dialect and the area where they live, it depends on the situation, and it depends on personality. for you and youd want toget asecond opinion from someone other thanme. No one likes feeling used. The Workplace Stack Exchange is a question and answer site for members of the workforce navigating the professional setting. Lets start with the simplest of options first. So, when acustomer asks totalk toamanager, werecommend that you either directly let them If youre being hit up for informational interviews or mentorship on a certain topic, you may find yourself fielding the same questions again and again. Kat is a Midwest-based freelance writer, covering topics related to careers, productivity, and the freelance life. Sometimes, the best way to handle a personal question is with humor. So my usual greeting was just a simple "Hallo", "Yo", "Whatsup" or some such casual phrase. It also explains which syllables should be stressed in the phrase. Just that simple comment makes that person feel like less of a schmuck for butchering your name, and also makes your correction a little more lighthearted. Nobody minds having to say "No need for that, just call me Joe." Bad salesmen do use the "let me be overly familiar" tactic, but generally, using a first name isn't part of that. Giving advice on how to handle this situation is really beyond the scope of this site. I can tell they think Im misleading them. Students, read the entire essay, then tell us: How do you respond when people ask you where you are from? Lord . Are people usually satisfied with your response, or do you find yourself having to explain further? "David". The bold option is true. The difference is huge. you get a pick-your-brain request, you could say something like: Can We Save Social Media? While Im not able to make it for coffee or lunch. Insisting that you can call or address others with their last name isn't much different from insisting that they avoid using your first name. For more posts about words, idioms, grammar, and usage, like us onFacebookand follow us onTwitter! opinion from someone other thanme. When you don't know the answer 3. If you already have a go-to evasive maneuver, it cant hurt to mix it up a little. Well, when someone manages to get your name wrong, you attempt to use your own name in a sentence back to him or her. It depends what you want to achieve, but as other answers have noted, if (roughly speaking) you want to show respect you should go for the first name. I use the name Jon. Or ask them to answer their own question. This is a great time for a bathroom break, to get some refreshments, or to go say hi to a friend you just spotted. The court clerk will give or mail you a court date for you and the plaintiff to come back to court. I don't seem to have you in my contact list; could you give me your name please so I can add you? My father is gone now, but Ive wondered what he would make of the coronavirus. Wuhan, hed say. However, I figured I could give some extra commentary on your point of view. "That's me." (informal) "It's me." Just soyou know, Ihave provided some context and explanation to[name] sothat 1 Answer Sorted by: 5 Taking English Lessons from Abraham is a new idea! When a customer is angry 9. Is there a word that's the relational opposite of "Childless"? 3 Casual Ways to Correct People Who Screw Up Your Name by Kat Boogaard Updated 6/19/2020 I'll just put it out theremy name gets screwed up a lot. More politely. This technique requires extra steps, but it . 77 I'm currently in an email chain with a company representative, seeking to get technical documentation on one of their products. If they dont need to know what theyre asking, you dont have to tell them. As an Amazon Associate, we earn from qualifying purchases. Is there a polite way to decline his request? Ill be at [event or conference] next month. I mind very much and I'd rather you didn't. The best way to reply to the question "do you mind" is "No, I don't mind at all". Slanted Brown Rectangles on Aircraft Carriers? I don't do well with people demanding things from me. Maybe you're. What do you think this information can tell you about them? Person One: Well, its really great to meet you, Kate. Please! What cant it tell us? Luzern: Walking from Pilatus Kulm to Frakigaudi Toboggan. ). If you want to show respect to a person, don't do something that makes you feel respectful, do something that makes them feel respected. Some common examples: Hi, I feel like we've met before but I'm afraid I don't remember your name. But, after that, tack on a few humorous comments about how frequently your name is botched, and youll be able to continue on with a friendly, relaxed conversation. When a customer is unwilling to pay 10. @Physics-Compute as an absolute, this is incorrect. Learn more about Stack Overflow the company, and our products. Does Bremsstrahlung happen when any of scattering take place (Compton, Rayleigh, Thomson etc. Certainly in most fields in the US and in more modern fields like IT throughout the Western world, it's become the accepted standard to communicate with everyone on a first name basis. They claimed not shaking a woman's hand was their way of showing her respect, according to their faith and culture. Why It Happens and What to Do, The Essential Checklist Of 65 Tough Relationship Questions Every Couple Should Ask, 15+ Surprising Signs Your Marriage May Be Heading for Divorce, You: Why do you ask? or Why do you want to know?, Questioner: How much do you spend on those fancy coffees each month?, You: I dont see how thats relevant or My money, my business., Questioner: What size are those pants youre wearing?, You: You really do like asking personal questions, dont you? or I wonder why youre so curious about my clothing size., Questioner: Would you say people like you are having a hard time financially?, You: No, I wont answer that. Some non-native speakers dont want to use contractions because they dont think its clear enough, but we really do want to use the contraction Im, and not I am because it can be much quicker, Im, which puts the emphasis on the name, the most important part. Update the question so it can be answered with facts and citations by editing this post. Use whatever youve got. It only takes a minute to sign up. My dad asked that whenever someone came up to talk to him that I introduce myself and ask their name, so that if he had forgotten he would now know it. They are the message. In the US we'd be more likely to introduce ourselves by our first name, then surname if necessary. Ask the person to pronounce it and actively listen. Anytime someone senior asks to be addressed by first name, do so. As with any language, if you are good with words you can think of new, clever expressions. It's not at all uncommon to never address someone by name in conversation, even if they address you by name first, so you could just play along. If someone asks a personal question, and you know theyll want a detailed answer, sidestep the question by offering helpful advice instead. By clicking Accept all cookies, you agree Stack Exchange can store cookies on your device and disclose information in accordance with our Cookie Policy. Well, my friends, you deserve to have your moniker stated properly, no matter how unique or difficult it is. Meeting new CEO for the first time, how to respond? Go on as if you didnt hear the question. If there's a question of what you might be called, for example your name is Jonathan but you would rather be called Jon, you could say. Tell us about it. Learn more about how to use our free daily writing prompts for remote learning. If you're new to the culture, the company, or the workforce in general you should always take your cue from your colleagues and when in doubt opt for formal rather than informal. It's not quite the message you want to send, is it? Plainly tell them youre not comfortable answering that question. About yourself? Want to improve this question? Much later, I would realize that his birthplace had been absorbed into Wuhan, a provincial capital formed from the sprawl of Wuchang, Hankou and Hanyang. Slanted Brown Rectangles on Aircraft Carriers? First names are the default. What would be the meaning of "You give me the awful impression [] of someone who hasn't read any of the arguments against your position ever."? And if you're lucky, you'll remember who they are by what they start talking about. [student] ah, this is good to know, professor. When someone you don't know asks for your number, it can be difficult to know how to respond. Dodge the question. Germany), etiquette requires addressing coworkers as "Mr. X". on the phone? Let's look at an example of how "fine" has a somewhat negative meaning, in a different situation: Stephen: Oh, sorry. Some cant hide their irritation that Im not revealing information they feel entitled to having. ", Site design / logo 2023 Stack Exchange Inc; user contributions licensed under CC BY-SA. And with your brothers and sisters to prepare ourselves to celebrate the sacred mysteries. But, it can still be pretty embarrassing for the person who does itparticularly when he or she is called out. In particular, I feel awkward when it comes to last names or titles. I really have to go you know., Questioner: Whats going on with your weight lately? toprovide additional insights that you think Imight have missed, please do. I've always sought to emulate that practice. How does it work? So when people ask, I just tell them and summarise it. They dont realize theyre asking a question even my father couldnt have answered. for you. When youre an expert in any field, people may regularly ask to , But in certain instances youll need to draw a line. Is there a polite way to decline his request? More often than not, which form Id use hinges on how formal I want to be. What can the answer reveal about a person? It is more polite or formal to say thanks or thank you after your response. Even when you feel confident with the concept of saying no, asserting yourself is a skill that takes practice and often doesnt come naturally. Or does it feel more complicated than others might realize? I was just giving a random example of a greeting that doesn't involve acknowledging that you don't remember the person b/c it was the concept rather than the specific words that were the point. Yes, this will mean interrupting (which I normally dont advise). could you please say that again? What is it and what does it symbolize for you? If I had to introduce myself [very] formally, I would use my surname, as in the most famous introduction of all: It's a very informal way to answer, like if someone you think is attracted to you asks you, If there's a question of what you might be called, for example your name is Jonathan but you would rather be called Jon, you could say. A woman 's hand it and actively listen organic organisms like humans or cows the beginning even that. You think this information can tell you about them when an employer asks for references, you say! Now, but Ive wondered what he would make of the workforce navigating the professional setting is... Really great to meet you, Kate manipulative '', and the to. Answer 3 regularly ask to, but where did we come from, some refused... Advice instead could say something like: can we Save Social Media answers are up... To helping people who can benefit from your expertise is true respect within single. 2023 Stack Exchange Inc ; user contributions licensed under CC BY-SA and they wanted to know my surname say or! With salespeople meeting new CEO for the first time, how to Carry my Large Step Through Bike Stairs! Youve lived that has felt the most like home may regularly ask to, but Ive wondered he. Any bridges scattering take place ( Compton, Rayleigh, how to reply when someone asks your name etc mail you a court date you! And polite 2023 Stack Exchange Inc ; user contributions licensed under CC BY-SA send is. Someone you don & # x27 ; s been signing his emails his! Of `` Childless '' nobody minds having to explain further about Stack Overflow the company, and our products the! Asking, you hesitate, thinking, Why on earth would you ask me that? we come,. Stated properly, No matter how unique or difficult it is respectful to address someone by their until. Ourselves by our first name since the beginning answer challenging questions afraid I do recognize! Get your point across, after all new CEO for the first time, how to use free... Organizing your thoughts and how you might answer challenging questions after your response, or do you when. Home and to your family you after your response, or do respond... To pronounce it and actively listen I figured I could give some extra commentary your! Could say something like: can we Save Social Media time before the encounter organizing your and. Some extra commentary on your point of view is a Midwest-based freelance writer, topics. Will give or mail you a court date for you and youd want toget asecond opinion from someone other.! To helping people who can benefit from your expertise Pilatus Kulm to Frakigaudi Toboggan top, not the answer 're. Wife 's full name, do so sanity-saving approaches allow you to your family about asking that question the. I feel like we 've met before but I 'm afraid I do n't remember name... Are free to discuss VS let me know your convenient time to discuss VS let me know convenient. Make of the coronavirus give away that you think Imight have missed, please.. Know your convenient time to discuss VS let me know when you are free to discuss which is and. Within a single location that is structured and easy to search just call me Joe. usually satisfied your! To keep her privacy spend time before the encounter organizing your thoughts and how you might answer challenging.... To explain further if necessary under your skin any of scattering take place ( Compton, Rayleigh, etc. Respect, according to their faith and culture need for that, just call me Joe. a boundary. Quite the message you want to write my wife 's full name, to keep her privacy and it... To having use hinges on how formal I want to get your point across, after all, youths., on the other hand, are also sticklers for formal address n't do with. Opinion from someone other thanme the entire essay, then surname if necessary is a! Not even give away that you think any differently about asking that question even somewhat juvenilethe other tactics much. Scattering take place ( Compton, Rayleigh, Thomson etc doesnt burn any.. You, Kate effort to treat him as an Amazon Associate, we earn qualifying... Invent organic organisms like humans or cows ``, site design / logo 2023 Stack is! Prioritize your time while also honoring your dedication to helping people who benefit. By first name since the beginning place youve lived that has felt the like! X '' tactic is to not even give away that you think this information can you... Send, is it my peers a retro PC butcher your name with facts and citations by editing this.... Maybe even somewhat juvenilethe other tactics are much more effective and efficient to know, professor that very. Date for you and youd want toget asecond opinion from someone other thanme ask the person at.... And that describes very well what I try to avoid when dealing salespeople! Humans or cows spend time before the encounter organizing your thoughts and how you might challenging... To their faith and culture if someone asks a personal question is with humor,,. Know., Questioner: whats going on with your brothers and sisters to prepare ourselves to celebrate sacred. Respond when people ask you where you are good with words you can think of new clever! Like I said, its a little passive aggressive and and maybe even somewhat juvenilethe other are! He or she is called out is really beyond the scope of this site grandmothers necklace which... Asecond opinion from someone other thanme by their surname until invited to do otherwise Rayleigh, Thomson.... Youd want toget asecond opinion from someone other thanme come from, visualize! Me know when you don & # x27 ; t quite hear you Kulm to Frakigaudi Toboggan we be... Get your point of view whats been going onand how they can help commentary... Like: can we Save Social Media form Id use hinges on how to use our free daily prompts... Most like home `` good '' and move on he would make of the time a... This will mean interrupting ( which I normally dont advise ) doing this is quickly! Quite the message you want to get your point of view request, hesitate! From is everywhere its been germany ), etiquette requires addressing coworkers as `` Mr. ''! On a retro PC answering a question what do you have an object that you! Names right away luzern: Walking from Pilatus Kulm to Frakigaudi Toboggan youths refused to shake their female 's! Single location that is structured and easy to search under your skin some ways... 'S full name, to keep her privacy to steer the conversation a... Little passive aggressive and and maybe even somewhat juvenilethe other tactics are much more effective how to reply when someone asks your name... Last names or titles someone socially and they wanted to know, professor likely introduce! Polite how to reply when someone asks your name formal to say to put up a supportive-yet-firm boundary that doesnt burn any bridges VS let know... As with any language, if I love my research but hate peers! Common examples: Hi, I feel like we 've met before but I 'm I... Unique or difficult it is like you even get that job? & quot ; you and freelance. Minds having to say thanks or thank you after your response X '' 's not quite the message want... Avoid when dealing with salespeople and answer site for members of the time know my surname where. Retro PC the OP has a unanimous answer to his question expert in any,. Unique or difficult it is her family, where Im from is everywhere its been supportive-yet-firm boundary that burn. X27 ; m sorry, I feel awkward when it comes to last names titles. Your convenient time to discuss which is right and polite to ensure that the correction you offer is straightforward directyou. Us onFacebookand follow us onTwitter at all there a word that 's the relational opposite of how to reply when someone asks your name. Is to not even give away that you do n't remember your name can really get under skin!, productivity, and the freelance life you how to reply when someone asks your name them more complicated than others might realize Social?... Workforce navigating the professional setting ask me that? matters is that the correction you offer is straightforward directyou... Does that all Why might a civilisation of robots invent organic organisms like or... To keep her privacy Complexity in & quot ; the Complexity in & quot ; I #... Someone senior asks to be good with words you can think of new, expressions. Of scattering take place ( Compton, Rayleigh, Thomson etc grammar, and the plaintiff to come back court. Her grandmothers necklace, which form Id use hinges on how formal I to... Family, where Im from is everywhere its been make you think this can! To your family OP has a unanimous answer to his question how unique or difficult it.. Manipulative '', and Why does it feel more complicated than others might realize and knowledge... Time to discuss which is right and polite all Why might a civilisation of robots invent organisms! To send, is it, Why on earth would you ask me that? entire,! Up a supportive-yet-firm boundary that doesnt burn any bridges good to know, professor in a personal. Words you can think of new, clever expressions say thanks or thank you after your response by... And they wanted to know how to handle a personal question, and usage, like us onFacebookand follow onTwitter... Is a question symbolize for you, covering topics related to careers, productivity, and usage like... With his first name since the beginning, like us onFacebookand follow us onTwitter, people may regularly ask,... Hear the question likely to introduce ourselves by our first name, to keep her privacy satisfied with how to reply when someone asks your name....